Why Women Cheat

(This content is being used for illustrative purposes only; any person depicted in the content is a model)

By Cheryl Steinberg

“All men are dogs.” We’ve heard that said quite a bit. And, mostly, it’s used as a response to news that someone’s man has been cheating. The thing is, women cheat, too. And, in fact, women who cheat do so for a lot of the same reasons that their male counterparts do: attraction, unsatisfying sex life, strife in the relationship, feeling neglected, looking to boost their ego, and a rift in the marriage.

Here are the typical reasons why women cheat:

• To get out of an unhappy relationship. Some women cheat to escape their relationship because they don’t know how to otherwise end it. Sometimes it’s too uncomfortable or awkward to say you want out, so instead, they cheat. Infidelity is often used as a way to sabotage the relationship because the woman is already unhappy, dissatisfied, or disgruntled, and wants out.

• To find that spark again. With the daily ins-and-outs of cohabitation, such as bills, exhaustion, kids (if applicable), and plain old monotony, the initial spark that kept a relationship the relationship hot and heavy can often fizzle out. Even if a woman’s isn’t actively seeking to cheat, the temptation of the “high” that comes with any new relationship can be hard to resist.
• An unsatisfying sex life. Let’s face it, sex and chemistry is just as important to a relationship as emotional attachment is. In fact, the two go hand-in-hand so, if the sex isn’t satisfying her, she isn’t feeling emotionally fulfilled and her interest may wander outside the relationship.

• Revenge and retaliation. If her partner has cheated, sometimes a woman will cheat as a way of getting back at him. It’s usually an effort to get the partner to feel the same hurt, anger, and jealousy that she had to endure.

• Low self-esteem. Getting attention from others can boost a woman’s self-confidence and self-esteem, which is a nice feeling and so, it isn’t any wonder that that could make having an affair more attractive. Having new suitors means getting compliments, phone calls/texts, flowers, and the like from someone other than her partner, which is a major ego stroke and makes the woman feel more attractive and wanted.

• It’s a learned behavior. Some women cheat because they’re modeling what they learned early on. That is, if they saw infidelity in their parents’ relationship, both men and women may follow that same pattern in their own lives.

• Mental illness or personality disorder. Sometimes, cheating is a symptom of mental illness. However, at the very least, women cheat because they experience an emotional disconnect or feel neglected in their current relationship.

• Something’s missing. Sometimes, women cheat because they’re simply missing something in their relationship. If a woman experiences an emotional disconnect from her partner, this can lead to loneliness and depression. In this case, it’s only a matter of time that she looks for someone else who can meet her emotional and physical needs and ease her loneliness.

• The Digital Age. With growing technology and the rise of social media sites, “cheating” can look a lot of different ways now than it did in the past. Cyber affairs are becoming more and more of a thing and they don’t even require ever having sex or even seeing the other person. But, having online affairs can still be an act of infidelity. Men and women tend to differ on this subject. While men often don’t consider this type of relationship an “affair,” women tend to see it differently, because of the emotional aspect of the online interactions.

At the Orchid Recovery Center, women’s health and well-being come first. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free 1-800-777-9588 to speak with an Addiction Specialist today.