9 Excuses That Will Keep You Miserable
The only thing that holds us back from being the best versions of ourselves that we could possibly be is the excuses that we give ourselves not to try. Excuses are one of the key ingredients to misery, especially for the alcoholic or addict who needs recovery to improve on their life beyond their own comprehension. The sad stories and the fears we develop over time are some of the truest enemies to our success and happiness, and the worst part is that it is all of our own making. In a sense we design our own failures based on the mistakes of the past, and we hesitate to even apply ourselves. Here are 9 excuses that will keep you miserable.
1. I’m too young…
Some people who struggle with drugs and/or alcohol think that it is just a phase, that it is excusable because they are young and they should have a chance to experiment. This whole theory falls apart however when you look at the way addicts and alcoholics drink and use, and the drastic effects it has on their lives. You are never too young to get help for a serious problem and save yourself some grief.
2. I’m too old…
Others want to tell themselves they are too old to change now. They might as well keep doing what they have been doing, because you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. The excuse that you are stuck in your ways, or that you might as well ride it out until the end is not going to cut it. Plenty of people who have seen the devastation and harm done to themselves and others around them take the chance to get treatment later in life. Especially when health is a factor, you want to take any opportunity to change, whether it is with treatment, or taking suggestions in recovery, it’s never too late to learn how to live.
3. I’m not smart enough…
The IQ of an addict or alcoholic does not determine their odds of staying sober and helping others. There are no GPA requirements or long division, thank god, to get help for substance abuse or addiction. You do not have to be a therapist or philosopher to understand the concept of changing your behaviors and learning to cope without drugs or alcohol. You only dumb yourself down by not letting yourself learn how to help yourself. Don’t worry, this will not be on the final.
4. I’m not strong enough…
If recovery and sobriety were all about will power, most people wouldn’t need to seek help. Nobody expects you to grit your teeth and push through addiction with no structure or program of recovery. Underestimating your own inner strength is a big issue with a lot of addicts and alcoholics. Telling yourself you are too weak to make a move is an easy way to stay miserable.
5. I’m not rich enough…
Some people think to get into treatment or to stay in a sober house in order to build a recovery foundation is too expensive and they just can’t swing it. There is a such thing as sobriety on a budget, and I speak from experience when I say it can all start with nothing in your pockets but hopes and dreams. If you really want to change, and get a new quality of life, you can easily find ways to get into some kind of program that will help put you on your feet, and you can get back some of the happiness you’ve been missing out on, with interest.
6. I’m not THAT sick…
Stigma on the disease of addiction or alcoholism still exists, that is pretty certain. Some people still have an assumption or expectation on what the sick and suffering addict or alcoholic looks like, which they use as an excuse to ignore the obvious wreckage that it has made out of their own life. ‘Well, I never did THAT’ or ‘I still have a JOB’ or even ‘I don’t do THOSE drugs’ are all pretty common examples of people trying to convince themselves they don’t need the kind of changes that others do. But if they are honest with themselves, it won’t be hard to see how when others get honest and take the help and suggestions, they actually get happy too, and life can be THAT good.
7. Nobody cares…
Depression, isolation and misery all go hand in hand in a lot of ways. Addicts and alcoholics typically are no stranger to depression, and isolation is something most experience at some point or another. All these feed into the idea that ‘Nobody cares if I get help’ and creates this negative self-worth that is completely counter-productive to recovery. It is an easy way out to pretend that no one else is effected or would even notice if we stopped using or drinking. This excuse is like when people say ‘I’m not hurting anyone but me’ while making everyone a little more miserable.
8. I can’t do this alone…
On the other side of that isolation can be co-dependency. Some people use the excuse that they need others to keep them doing the right things. One of the best parts about recovery is that no one expects us to do it alone! We are supposed to have sober supports and a group of people who help us through, especially in 12 step programs when you have a sponsor to guide you through the work. That being said, at the end of the day YOU have to put in the work.
9. I’m not worth it…
This is the MOST untrue of the entire list of excuses people find not to do what they need to in order to be victorious. They enforce a negative ego and tear themselves down in order to avoid change. By creating the belief that you are not worthy of happiness, that you as a person are not worth the time and effort and love that people are willing to put into helping you, you only set yourself up for more failure. Ridiculing yourself, putting yourself down, and diminishing your value in order to justify your self-destructive behavior is a terrible excuse! And if others try to feed this negative image, it is only because misery loves company.
You have all the ingredients to be a miracle story. You are an incredible creature, made up of specks or stardust and limitless potential to achieve and excel in ways you can only dream of, and it is all possible when you stop making excuses and start making choices that can save your life. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free 1-800-777-9588
“Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses.”
– George Washington Carver